Rik Mayall as Alan B'stard in The New Statesman

The New Statesman was an award-winning British sitcom of the late 1980s and early 1990s satirising the Conservative government of the time. It was written by Laurence Marks and Maurice Gran at the request of, and as a starring vehicle for, its principal actor, Rik Mayall. Many people consider the show a hybrid of Yes Minister and another Rik Mayall sitcom, The Young Ones. Image File history File links A picture of Rik Myall as Alan Bstard in the New Statesman File history Legend: (cur) = this is the current file, (del) = delete this old version, (rev) = revert to this old version. ... Image File history File links A picture of Rik Myall as Alan Bstard in the New Statesman File history Legend: (cur) = this is the current file, (del) = delete this old version, (rev) = revert to this old version. ... A sitcom or situation comedy is a genre of comedy performance originally devised for radio but today typically found on television. ... The 1980s refers to the years of 1980 to 1989. ... For the band, see 1990s (band). ... The Conservative Party (officially the Conservative & Unionist Party) is currently the second largest political party in the United Kingdom in terms of sitting Members of Parliament (MPs), and the largest in terms of public membership. ... Laurence Marks (born 8 December 1948 in Islington, London) is one half of writing duo Marks & Gran. ... Maurice Bernard Gran (born 26 October 1949 in London) is one half of writing duo Marks & Gran. ... To meet Wikipedias quality standards, this article or section may require cleanup. ... Yes Minister is a satirical British sitcom that was first transmitted by BBC television and radio between 1980 and 1984. ... To meet Wikipedias quality standards, this article or section may require cleanup. ... A sitcom or situation comedy is a genre of comedy performance originally devised for radio but today typically found on television. ... The Young Ones was an anarchic British sitcom which ran for two seasons in 1982 and 1984. ...

The show's theme tune is an arrangement by Alan Hawkshaw of part of the Promenade from Pictures at an Exhibition by Russian composer Modest Mussorgsky. Alan Hawkshaw is a composer and performer, particularly of themes for movies and television programmes. ... Mussorgsky in 1874 Pictures at an Exhibition (Russian: , Kartínki s výstavki – Vospominániye o Víktore Gártmane, Pictures from an Exhibition – a Remembrance of Viktor Hartmann) is a famous suite of ten piano pieces composed by Modest Mussorgsky in 1874. ... Modest Petrovich Mussorgsky (Russian: , Modest Petrovič Musorgskij, French: ) (March 9/21, 1839 – March 16/28, 1881), one of the Russian composers known as the Five, was an innovator of Russian music. ...

Castlist

• Rik Mayall as Alan B'Stard
• Michael Troughton as Piers Fletcher-Dervish
• Marsha Fitzalan as Sarah B'Stard
• Rowena Cooper as Norman/Norma Bormann (Series 1; she was credited as "R. R. Cooper" in order to keep her gender uncertain)
• Charles Gray as Roland Gidleigh-Park (Series 1)
• Vivien Heilbron as Beatrice Protheroe (Series 1)
• Stephen Nallon as Mrs Thatcher (Series 1-2)
• John Nettleton as Sir Stephen Baxter (Series 1-2)
• Nick Stringer as Bob Crippen (Series 1-2)
• Berwick Kaler as Geoff Diquead (Series 2)
• Terence Alexander as Sir Greville McDonald (Series 3-4)

To meet Wikipedias quality standards, this article or section may require cleanup. ... Michael Troughton (born 2 March 1955 in Hampstead, London, England, UK) is an English actor. ... Marsha Fitzalan The Lady Marcia Mary Josephine Fitzalan Howard, better known as Marsha Fitzalan (born in Bonn, Germany on March 10, 1953), is the third daughter of the late Miles Fitzalan Howard, 17th Duke of Norfolk and his wife, the (Dowager) Duchess of Norfolk, the former Anne Constable-Maxwell. ... Charles Gray (August 29, 1928 - March 7, 2000) was a British actor, born Donald Marshall Gray in Bournemouth, Dorset. ... Berwick Kaler (born 1947) is a British actor most famous for playing the dame in the York Theatre Royals annual pantomime, which he also writes and directs. ... Terence Alexander (born 11 March 1923 in London) is a British actor. ...

Characters

ALAN B'STARD The main character was Alan Beresford B'Stard, a selfish, greedy, dishonest, devious, lecherous, sadistic ultra-right wing Conservative back bencher. It was mostly set in B'stard's antechambers in the House of Commons and featured Piers Fletcher-Dervish (played by Michael Troughton, son of Patrick Troughton) as B'Stard's twittish upper-class side-kick. In politics, right-wing, the political right, or simply the right, are terms which refer, with no particular precision, to the segment of the political spectrum in opposition to left-wing politics. ... A backbencher is a Member of Parliament or a legislator who does not hold governmental office and is not a Front Bench spokesperson in the Opposition. ... The House of Commons is the lower house of the Parliament of the United Kingdom. ... Patrick George Troughton (March 25, 1920 – March 28, 1987) was a versatile and prolific English actor best known in his role as the second incarnation of the Doctor in the long running British science-fiction television series Doctor Who, which he played from 1966 until 1969. ...

B'Stard was MP for the then fictional constituency of Haltemprice. In 1997, re-drawn boundaries led to the constituency of Boothferry in East Yorkshire being re-named "Haltemprice and Howden". By an amusing twist of fate, the seat's first incumbent was renowned right-winger David Davis, a Conservative leadership candidate in 2001 and 2005. B'Stard happened to share a middle name with Norman Tebbit although he bore no other similarities to him either. Haltemprice and Howden is a constituency represented in the House of Commons of the Parliament of the United Kingdom. ... David Davis, the name of several people, may refer to: David Davis (British politician) (born 1948), Conservative MP in British Parliament and Conservative leadership candidate in 2005 David Davis (Supreme Court justice) (1815–1886), Supreme Court Justice and U.S. Senator from Illinois David Davis (Australian politician) (born 1962), Liberal... Norman Beresford Tebbit, Baron Tebbit, CH, PC (born 29 March 1931) is a British Conservative politician and former MP for Chingford, who was born in Southgate in Enfield. ...

Alan was the youngest MP at the age of 31 and personified the greed and uncaring nature of the worst excesses of new money Thatcherites. B'Stard was married to the devious Sarah, a vain, bi-sexual nymphomaniac who wanted nothing more than for Alan to die so she could become a rich widow. The couple cheated on each other in perpetuity but remained in a marriage of convenience; Sarah because of Alan's money and Alan because Sarah's father controlled the local Tory Party and held Alan's seat in his gift. Alan's schemes grew wilder and more bold as the series progressed taking in bribery, murder and provoking Trade Union disputes to make a profit. Later, B'Stard would intentionally mismanage the Tory election campaign so Labour would be blamed for an economic crisis, stage his own assassination to bring back hanging (and make £1,000,000 in the process) and in the last episode create splits in both the Tory and Labour Parties and named himself Lord Protector.

Whatever crises and scandals swirled around the evil B'Stard, he would always come up smelling of roses. When accused of engaging in sex acts with minors, Alan successfully sued the Times newspaper; when he plotted to get his hands on the stolen millions of Robert Maxwell who was hiding in Bosnia he was hailed as a humanitarian hero. Even when Alan was sentenced to death he managed to escape the noose and retain his position in Parliament. B'Stard's greatest triumph came when he managed to get himself released from incarceration in a Siberian gulag following his assassination attempt on Gorbachev and returned to the UK a hero. The Times is a national newspaper published daily in the United Kingdom since 1785, and under its current name since 1788. ... Motto: none Anthem: Intermeco Capital (and largest city) Sarajevo Official languages Bosnian,Croatian,Serbian Government Republic  - Presidency members NebojÅ¡a Radmanović (Presiding Chair, Serb) Haris Silajdžić (Vice President, (Bosniak) Željko KomÅ¡ić (Vice President, (Croat)  - Chairman of the Council of Ministers Nikola Å pirić Independence from Yugoslavia   - Declared March 1... Mikhail Sergeyevich Gorbachev (Russian: ; Pronunciation: mih-kha-ILL ser-GHE-ye-vich gor-bah-CHOFF) (born March 2, 1931), was leader of the Soviet Union from 1985 until 1991. ...

B'Stard would habitually use the others to aid his quest for money and power. Sidney Bliss the local Pub Landlord (and former Hangman) was completely in his power in the hope of regaining his position. Many others from old Nazis, Cabinet Ministers and even Salman Rushdie would regularly pay to buy his silence. Salman Rushdie (born Ahmed Salman Rushdie, on June 19, 1947, in Bombay, India) is a British-Indian essayist and author of fiction, most of which is set on the Indian subcontinent. ...

In the stage show it was revealed that Alan had been the architect of New Labour when he realised the Tories were done for (effectively ignoring the last episode of the series), picking a young guitar playing hippie named Tony Blair and grooming him to be PM. B'Stard transformed Labour into a second Conservative Party, eradicating socialism and effectively running the country from his palatial office at Number 9 Downing Street. The show saw an older Alan, fabulously rich after orchestrating Black Wednesday, still up to his old tricks playing America and Al-Qaeda off each other in the hunt for weapons of mass destruction. For other people of the same name, see Tony Blair (disambiguation) Anthony Charles Lynton Blair (born 6 May 1953)[1] is the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, First Lord of the Treasury, Minister for the Civil Service, Leader of the UK Labour Party, and Member of the UK Parliament... In British politics and economics, Black Wednesday refers to September 16, 1992 when the government was forced to withdraw the Pound from the European Exchange Rate Mechanism (ERM) by currency speculators—most notably George Soros who earned over US$1 billion in doing so. ... Al-Qaeda (Arabic: القاعدة, the foundation or the base) is the name given to a worldwide network of militant Islamist organizations under the leadership of Osama bin Laden. ...

SIR PIERS FLETCHER-DERVISH B'Stard's sidekick in his machinations was the upper-class and old school (but incredibly dim-witted) Tory Piers. Piers was essentially a very kind-hearted and hard working MP, albeit one who rarely speaks in the house and is completely under Alan's control. Usually Piers is conned into Alan's scheme's through trickery or bullying although he would inevitably cock up the simplest of instructions. It was even claimed that Piers only became a Barrister at Law and MP (for the Wiltshire seat of Divises, in his family for generations) through the intervention of his Teddy. Even when Piers married the redoubtable Clarissa he remained in B'Stard's power despite occasional flashes of rebellion. It was Piers's intervention in Alan's fake shooting that led to B'Stard being sentenced to death and his ability as a lover that helped persuade Sarah to rescue Piers and abandon Alan in Siberia. Eventually, Piers would rise to become European Commissioner for Internal Relations, but even in this exalted role Alan would hold the reigns of power.

SARAH B'STARD Alan's vengeful, bi-sexual wife who equalled Alan in his capacity for adultery and deviousness. Sarah originally remained married to Alan purely for money but their relationship evolved as the series progressed. Though their hatred was always mutual, the dynamic in the couple's sexual relationship would often shift and change. In the first series Sarah could not contemplate sleeping with B'Stard although in the second it was Alan who tried to fight off his wife's attentions. By the time of the fourth series, the couple had lapsed into a form of 'psychopathic revenge lust', regularly sleeping together despite attempts to do each other harm. When B'Stard was due to hang, Sarah invited the Minister for Law and Order home for sex rather than to pardon him and gleefully abandoned her husband in the frozen wastes of Siberia 'because she could'. Following Sarah and Alan's divorce (a sub-plot of the original stage show), Alan B'Stard's Sunday Telegraph column made reference to her 'coming over all dead'.

Memorable quotes

On the future of the NHS:

"It used to be very simple; you were poor, you got sick, and you died."

On the woman's right to choose:

"It should be the State's right to choose. Ugly, stupid, poor people shouldn't be allowed to have children."

When being spoken to by a mugger:

"Sorry, I don't speak unemployed!"

Audience reaction

The sitcom was one of the most critically successful ITV comedy series of its day, and developed a strong following: the audience laughter was so loud and persistent that it apparently caused the show to overrun and the writers had to shorten the scripts to compensate. However, it was also cruel and irreverent, treating all its subjects with black humour and violent slapstick. It has been suggested that Channel 3 (UK) be merged into this article or section. ...

Return

In March 2006 Marks and Gran revealed that B'Stard would return in a stage show, having defected to the Labour Party as they are "young, sexy and more right wing than the Tory Party". [1] The Prime Minister refused to comment. [2] The show is currently running at Trafalgar Studios 1 in London until 27 January 2007.

Episode list

This is an episode list for the British sitcom The New Statesman. A British sitcom is a situation comedy (sitcom) produced in the United Kingdom. ...

Series 1

1. Happiness Is A Warm Gun (September 13, 1987) - Alan is elected MP for Haltemprice after orchestrating a car crash which takes out his opponents on election eve. To deflect a police investigation Alan introduces a bill to allow police to carry arms. After it passes, Alan makes a fortune selling defective guns to the Yorkshire constabulary.
2. Passport to Freedom (September 20, 1987) - Sarah (Alan's wife) inherits shares in OCELOT motors and plans to divorce Alan, while Alan forgets his passport on the way to a conference in Germany. Realising Alan will lose his seat if Sarah divorces him as his Father-in-law is Chairman of the local Tory Party, Alan plots to bankrupt OCELOT by provoking a Trade Union dispute.
3. Sex is Wrong (September 27, 1987) - Alan gets involved with an anti-porn lobby campaign after hearing they have a good collection of exhibits. Alan impersonates Sir Steven Baxter in order to get funds to finance a porn publication and things come to a head at the Conservative Party conference.
4. Waste Not, Want Not (October 4, 1987) - Alan is lumbered with a large amount of nuclear waste and needs to find a large, disused hole nearby. Underneath the local Primary school perhaps?
5. Friends of St. James (October 11, 1987) - Alan is tricked by his old school fag who gets him high and persuades him to part with cash to open a bank in a foreign country. Alan spots a chance to become a hero.
6. Three Line Whipping (October 18, 1987) - Alan nearly misses a television interview while at a brothel and attacks a taxi driver. Whilst in disguise, Alan spots a chance to ingratiate himself with Mrs Thatcher.
7. Baa Baa Black Sheep (October 25, 1987) - Alan makes a deal with an American burger company in an effort to provide jobs when the local party thinks about deselecting him. Alan demands one last favour from Norma(n) before he pays for his sex change.

September 13 is the 256th day of the year (257th in leap years). ... 1987 (MCMLXXXVII) was a common year starting on Thursday of the Gregorian calendar. ... September 20 is the 263rd day of the year (264th in leap years). ... 1987 (MCMLXXXVII) was a common year starting on Thursday of the Gregorian calendar. ... September 27 is the 270th day of the year (271st in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1987 (MCMLXXXVII) was a common year starting on Thursday of the Gregorian calendar. ... October 4 is the 277th day of the year (278th in leap years) in the Gregorian Calendar. ... 1987 (MCMLXXXVII) was a common year starting on Thursday of the Gregorian calendar. ... October 11 is the 284th day of the year (285th in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1987 (MCMLXXXVII) was a common year starting on Thursday of the Gregorian calendar. ... October 18 is the 291st day of the year (292nd in leap years). ... 1987 (MCMLXXXVII) was a common year starting on Thursday of the Gregorian calendar. ... October 25 is the 298th day of the year (299th in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1987 (MCMLXXXVII) was a common year starting on Thursday of the Gregorian calendar. ...

Series 2

1. Fatal Extraction (January 15, 1989) - Alan puts forward a bill to disenfranchise the working class, in order to allow the Tories to gain control of a left-wing council in which oil has been discovered.
2. Live From Westminster (January 22, 1989) - Alan takes the introduction of TV cameras in the House of Commons as a chance to improve his standing.
3. The Wapping Conspiracy (January 29, 1989) - The press finds out that Alan has become patron of the Young Ladies' Recreational Association in order to get close to a number of nubile girls.
4. The Haltemprice Bunker (February 5, 1989) - Alan joins a hunt for a Nazi war criminal, in order to put him on a lecture tour (rather than to take him to trial).
5. California Here I Come (February 12, 1989) - Alan goes to Hollywood to cut a deal with a top TV producer but ends up in jail for possession of drugs.
6. May The Best Man Win (February 19, 1989) - Piers plans to get married, his fiancee threatening to take Piers out from Alan's manipulative influence.
7. Piers Of The Realm (February 26, 1989) - Attending a horse race, Alan makes an all-too-rare visit to his constituency. On returning to Westminster, he discovers that Piers is no-longer a mere back-bench MP.

January 15 is the 15th day of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1989 (MCMLXXXIX) was a common year starting on Sunday of the Gregorian calendar. ... January 22 is the 22nd day of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1989 (MCMLXXXIX) was a common year starting on Sunday of the Gregorian calendar. ... January 29 is the 29th day of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1989 (MCMLXXXIX) was a common year starting on Sunday of the Gregorian calendar. ... February 5 is the 36th day of the year in the Gregorian Calendar. ... 1989 (MCMLXXXIX) was a common year starting on Sunday of the Gregorian calendar. ... February 12 is the 43rd day of the year in the Gregorian Calendar. ... 1989 (MCMLXXXIX) was a common year starting on Sunday of the Gregorian calendar. ... February 19 is the 50th day of the year in the Gregorian Calendar. ... 1989 (MCMLXXXIX) was a common year starting on Sunday of the Gregorian calendar. ... February 26 is the 57th day of the year in the Gregorian Calendar. ... 1989 (MCMLXXXIX) was a common year starting on Sunday of the Gregorian calendar. ...

Specials

Comic Relief (March 1989).

Who Shot Alan B'Stard? (January 14, 1990) - The world of politics is in shock after the shooting of Alan B'Stard at the end of the last series. The assassination attempt has coincided with the House of Commons vote on capital punishment and politician's are nervous. With the House deadlocked, one MP's vote could decide all - time for a certain Mr.B'Stard to vote for the hangman's return. Alan milks his 'miraculous recovery' at the hand's of spiritual healer Chief Amlumi for all it is worth, setting up bogus charities, winning the contract to restore the gallows and doing the chat-show circuit. One chat show host, Kerry Grout, is however in league with B'Stard's wife and accuses Alan on a live TV show of being a fraud to which a flustered Alan retaliates with a threat to Grout's life. Unfortunately this is captured by the cameras. With Grout and Sarah desperate for proof against Alan, they enlist the help of Piers to demonstrate the fake shooting of B'Stard. Unfortunately, Piers accidentally shoots Grout dead and jumps into the Thames in his panic. When Alan is then discovered next to Grout's body he is arrested and sentenced to death. The first victim of his own policy, to be hung by his own gallows. January 14 is the 14th day of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... ...

Even Piers's return and admission of guilt is rejected by court and Alan is led to the gallows in fear. Just as Sidney Bliss pulls the lever however and Alan drops through the trap door, he is saved by the cheapness of his own contractors. In an effort to reap maximum profit, Alan's company, Britnoose, had constructed the gallows from balsa wood which collapses under Alan's weight.

This apparent 'Act of God' reprieves Alan in law and he is free to return to his devious ways.

Series 3

1. Labour Of Love (January 6, 1991) -An apparently politically bankrupt Alan is dismayed when an even more right-wing MP (Victor Crosby) wins a by-election. Alan sets up an elaborate framing of the new upstart by stealing government secrets and passing them to the Labour Party, making it look as if Crosby's the culprit. Alan sets out to prove he is indisputably the most Right Wing Member of Parliament.
2. The Party's Over (January 13, 1991) - An economic crisis is looming and the Tories want to have an election as quickly as possible before the oil runs out. Alan is picked to run the campaign and the Tories' lead rockets over Labour. B'Stard is shocked though when Sir Greville tells him that actually the Conservatives want to lose....Time for Piers's unique talents?
3. Let Them Sniff Cake (January 20, 1991) - Animal rights campaigners issue death threats against Alan, who is also involved in drug dealing (guest starred John Sessions).
4. Keeping Mum (January 27, 1991) - Alan supports a bill to reduce social security benefits to pensioners, until his own mother turns up. B'Stard is also aggrieved when Piers's Father dies and ascends to the Baronetcy.
5. Natural Selection (February 3, 1991) - After finding out he is to be deselected, Alan sets out to ruin the local businessman who is to succeed him, simultaneously recking the career of Julian Whittaker, a stamp collecting junior minister at the treasury.
6. Profit Of Boom (February 10, 1991) - Promoting capitalism in the Soviet Union, Alan is arrested after conspiring to assassinate Mikhail Gorbachev and incarcerated in a Siberian gulag.

January 6 is the 6th day of the year in the Gregorian calendar, with 359 days (360 in leap years) remaining. ... 1991 (MCMXCI) was a common year starting on Tuesday of the Gregorian calendar. ... January 13 is the 13th day of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1991 (MCMXCI) was a common year starting on Tuesday of the Gregorian calendar. ... January 20 is the 20th day of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1991 (MCMXCI) was a common year starting on Tuesday of the Gregorian calendar. ... John Sessions in the 1990 film Sweet Revenge. ... January 27 is the 27th day of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1991 (MCMXCI) was a common year starting on Tuesday of the Gregorian calendar. ... February 3 is the 34th day of the year in the Gregorian Calendar. ... 1991 (MCMXCI) was a common year starting on Tuesday of the Gregorian calendar. ... February 10 is the 41st day of the year in the Gregorian Calendar. ... 1991 (MCMXCI) was a common year starting on Tuesday of the Gregorian calendar. ... Mikhail Sergeyevich Gorbachyov ( , IPA: , commonly written as Mikhail Gorbachev; born March 2, 1931) was the last leader of the Soviet Union, serving from 1985 until its collapse in 1991. ... Gulag ( , Russian: ) is an acronym for Главное Управление Исправительно—Трудовых Лагерей и колоний, Glavnoye Upravleniye Ispravitelno-trudovykh Lagerey i kolonii, The Chief Directorate [or Administration] of Corrective Labour Camps and Colonies of the NKVD. Anne Applebaum, in her book Gulag: A History, explains: // Literally, the word GULAG is an acronym, meaning Glavnoe Upravlenie Lagerei, or Main Camp...

Series 4

1. Back From The Mort (November 22, 1992) - Alan is released from the gulag and returns to the UK a hero. Joy is short-lived however as Alan finds he has lost his seat, his businesses are ruined and his wife has stolen his money and set up with an MEP for East Germany. Alan manipulates Piers into giving up his seat for Sir Greville's return to Parliament and elevation to Secretary of State for European Affairs and sees Piers created European Commissioner for Internal Relations. Meanwhile Alan arranges for his wife's lover to meet with a grisly end, gets his money back from Sarah and has his eye on the now vacant seat of Obersaxony East Germany. Tomorrow belongs to Alan....
2. H*A*S*H (November 29, 1992) - Alan attempts to make money from the possible legalisation of cannabis but falls foul of established drug dealers in the EC. Sarah meanwhile has a score to settle.
3. Speaking In Tongues (December 6, 1992) - Alan invents a scheme to make money, using the European Community translators. As usual, Piers is the key........
4. Heil And Farewell (December 13, 1992) - Alan manipulates a growing neo-Nazi group and the son of a former Communist dictator into handing over their fortunes to him. B'Stard is at his most ruthless as he arranges for the murder of over 700 people just to save his own skin.
5. A Bigger Splash (December 20, 1992) - Robert Maxwell is holed up in Bosnia with half a billion pounds. Alan thinks this makes it the perfect time to launch a personal humanitarian mission to the region using the surprisingly successful Fletcher-Dervish peace talks.
6. The Irresistible Rise of Alan B'Stard (December 26, 1992) - Alan's shares are going down "quicker than ol' jug ears does on Camilla". B'Stard hatches a ruthless plan to get his country back onto her knees (one step at a time) by splitting both the Labour and Tory Parties and assuming the centuries-vacant title of Lord Protector. The United Kingdom is now Alan's 'plaything'....

November 22 is the 326th day (327th on leap years) of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1992 (MCMXCII) was a leap year starting on Wednesday. ... November 29 is the 333rd (in leap years the 334th) day of the year in the Gregorian Calendar. ... 1992 (MCMXCII) was a leap year starting on Wednesday. ... December 6 is the 340th day (341st on leap years) of the year in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1992 (MCMXCII) was a leap year starting on Wednesday. ... December 13 is the 347th day of the year (348th in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1992 (MCMXCII) was a leap year starting on Wednesday. ... December 20 is the 354th day of the year (355th in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. ... 1992 (MCMXCII) was a leap year starting on Wednesday. ... December 26 is the 360th day of the year in the Gregorian Calendar, 361st in leap years. ... 1992 (MCMXCII) was a leap year starting on Wednesday. ...

Special

A B'Stard Exposed (December 30, 1994) - Brian Walden Alan B'Stard M.P has returned to domestic Parliament following a Welsh By-election conspicuous by the absence of any opponents. They were found after polling day at the bottom of a coal mine. B'Stard is grilled by veteran broadcaster Brian Walden and reveals his vision for 21st century Britain. December 30 is the 364th day of the year (365th in leap years) in the Gregorian Calendar, with 1 day remaining. ... 1994 (MCMXCIV) was a common year starting on Saturday of the Gregorian calendar, and was designated as the International Year of the Family and the International Year of the Sport and the Olympic Ideal by United Nations. ... Brian Walden (born July 8, 1932) was a Labour Member of Parliament and is now a journalist and broadcaster. ...

Stage Show

Episode 2006: The Blair B'Stard Project - Alan, having defected to New Labour and now in charge of the fictional 9 Downing Street, assisted by his new sidekick Frank, the last Socialist in the New Labour Government (perhaps the country) connives with Condoleezza Rice and an al-Qaeda operative in an effort to have himself named Lord Protector of Great Britain, and settle a divorce from his wife, while being harassed by the al-Qaeda operative Habibi. Downing Street For a wider coverage of London, visit the London Portal. ... Socialism is a social and economic system (or the political philosophy advocating such a system) in which the economic means of production are owned and controlled collectively by the people. ... Condoleezza Rice (born November 14, 1954 in Birmingham, Alabama) is the 66th United States Secretary of State, and the second in the administration of President George W. Bush to hold the office. ... Al-Qaeda (Arabic: القاعدة, the foundation or the base) is the name given to a worldwide network of militant Islamist organizations under the leadership of Osama bin Laden. ... Lord Protector is a particular English title for Heads of State, with two meanings (and full styles) at different periods of history. ... It has been suggested that Divorcee be merged into this article or section. ...

ALAN B'STARD'S EXTREMELY SECRET WEAPON - The stage show returns with a sequel in late 2006, touring into 2007. Alan is plotting to become one of the shadowy elite of politicians who control the world's oil supplies.

The Sunday Telegraph

Tying in with the original run of the stage show and continuing at present, British Broadsheet newspaper The Sunday Telegraph runs a weekly opinion column penned by Alan B'Stard himself (in reality his creators, Marks and Gran). In it, Mr. B'Stard writes as the founder of New Labour and effective ruler of the country, commenting on the week's events in politics, often referring to his frustrations with Tony and the rest of the cabinet. Interestingly, the column is written to suggest that the stage show is actually written by B'Stard himself as a method of communicating his achievements to 'the ordinary's', thus creating a 'fiction within a fiction' situation. One column incidentally mentioned how after Alan's divorce from his wife (a sub-plot of the original stage show), the ex Mrs. B'Stard "came over all dead".

See also

• Yes Minister
• The Young Ones
• Bottom
• Believe Nothing

Yes Minister is a satirical British sitcom that was first transmitted by BBC television and radio between 1980 and 1984. ... The Young Ones was an anarchic British sitcom which ran for two seasons in 1982 and 1984. ... Adrian Edmondson (left) and Rik Mayall (right) as Eddie and Richie in Bottom Bottom was a British sitcom of the early 1990s (and later a series of stage shows and a film) written by Rik Mayall and Adrian Edmondson, who were the shows main stars, playing Richard Richard (Richie... Believe Nothing (2002) is a British sitcom starring Rik Mayall as Quadruple Professor Adonis Cnut, the cleverest man in England and Oxfords leading moral philosopher. ...

External links

• The New Statesmen Series Guide
• British Film Institute Screen Online