IBS News, A Broken News Network

Broken News is a comedy programme shown on BBC Two in autumn 2005. The show pokes fun at the world of 24-hour rolling news channels. The title of the show is a pun on the phrase "Breaking News". The first series features six episodes which last 30 minutes each. Having previously worked on programs such as People Like Us and The Sunday Format, the show's production team have worked closely with writer and director John Morton. Image File history File links Brokenews. ... Image File history File links Brokenews. ... BBC Two (or BBC2 as it was formerly styled) was the second UK television station to be aired by the BBC and the first British television channel to broadcast regularly in colour (from 1967), envisaged as a home for less mainstream and more ambitious programming. ... Template:Diffgggtgerent calendars 2005 (MMV) was a common year starting on Saturday of the Gregorian calendar. ... For the pseudonym of the musician Vicki Bennett, see People Like Us (musician). ... The Sunday Format, BBC Radio 4s first high-quality weekend broadsheet newspaper, is a British satirical radio comedy. ... John Morton is a British writer and director associated with the BBC Radio and television networks. ...

The show jump-cuts between its various spoof TV channels, which cover both the central story and other stories that would be of interest to their audience. A large part of the comedy comes from observations about the nature of news presentation rather than the stories themselves.

The programme centres on Britain's addiction to 24-hour news channels. Each week, Broken News looks at a fictitious news story such as "Tomato Flu" or "The End of the Rain". Its massive cast of 145 actors fill their roles as anchors and reporters on different networks. News channels are television specialty channels that present news content. ... For alternate meanings see anchor (disambiguation) The purpose of a ships or boats anchor is to attach the vessel to the ground at a specific point. ...

The first series is set to be released on DVD Region 2 on 12 June 2006. DVD-R writing/reading side DVD (also known as Digital Versatile Disc or Digital Video Disc) is an optical disc storage media format that can be used for data storage, including movies with high video and sound quality. ... June 12 is the 163rd day of the year in the Gregorian calendar (164th in leap years), with 202 days remaining. ... 2006 (MMVI) is a common year starting on Sunday of the Gregorian calendar. ...

The featured networks

The programme features mainly following fictitious networks:

• Aronovitz Business News. This business and financial news station features onscreen graphics similar in style to Bloomberg Television. Most of the screen is taken up by graphs and stock-tickers with only a small window where Gary Mills and Mitchell Oatis tend to argue with rather 'colourful' similes ("Well, Marks and Spencer are leading investors up the garden path yet again. Why do we have to say 'Yes, we love the underwear and the food'? Why not merge them to make edible underwear?") . Some of the smaller graphics transition by spinning around on a regular basis, and sometimes the studio window spins, as an extra joke.

• ESN News is an example of style over content where news is forever coming up but never arrives ("Still to come, a round-up of the reminders of the news still to come."). Largely based on the ITV News Channel, with a rolling news ticker, two newscasters (Katie Tait and Richard Pritchard) at a desk at the front of the studio. Melanie Bellamy delivers the "standing news" to a large screen at the back of the studio, displaying slightly nauseating floating graphics. The station has a reporter embedded with the crew of the International Space Station, Nick Burnham, who is inevitably miles away from the news. He therefore exaggerates all stories to make the situation seem as dire as possible ("We have been informed that up a third of our supplies contain Tomatoids, and we've already eaten half!"). The station also reads out ill-informed text messages sent in by viewers ("I blame the breakdown of society on society", "I'm not a Nazi sympathiser, but why don't we ever sympathise with them.") and performs phone polls ("Are children all criminals? Yes: 104%, No: 103%).

• Film and Movie News features interviews with all the star names in the movie industry, similar in style to Jonathan Ross hosted Film programme. Joe Reed is the resident presenter and film critic (and part-time lecturer in Film Studies at the University of Bournemouth), who flatters film stars during interviews — and then berates their performances in reviews ("I thought I was going to vomit so hard, my liquified kidneys would be forced out of my nose" and "If you see this train-wreck of a movie, you will feel the overwhelming desire to rip out your eyes and force them up into your ears, just so you can't see or hear this film.").

• GO Sports 1 is a sports news channel in the style of Sky Sports News, featuring bizarre stats on the right hand side of the screen such as which Premiership club owns the most Dido CDs and who are the top football lovers this season. The main anchors are Kevin Peters and Natalie Gosling, with Guy Baston as reporter ("Manchester United have denied that starting other Manchester Uniteds in China, Japan, Australia, the US, Scotland, Wales and London would make the club any less unique or be in the least bit confusing"). The channel also runs several other channels (GO Sports 1 2 to GO Sports 1 5) which show non-stop match buildup, post match analysis, repeats and multiangle interactive repeats of all the big matches.

• IBS News is an American news channel that appears to be a parody of FOX News. The station's newsreaders, Anthony Markowitz and Julia Regan, give long pieces of opinion after every topic, often using the phrases 'I'm no expert' or 'I don't pretend to know much about this, but...'. Anthony tends to give colloquial, ill-informed opinion ("When you flush the toilet on an aeroplane, do you ever think about where it goes? I sure don't!"), while Julia gives incredibly political commentary on the outcome ("Imagine the effect this will have on the already strict aviation guidelines in force"). They then inevitably link the story, however tenuously, to the weather report ("No more frozen urine falling from the sky, but expect rain over North Carolina"). It also covers the "Vincenti Trial", a parody of the Michael Jackson and O.J. Simpson trials, where the main defendant is accused of murdering his wife who was having affairs with three different women in three hotels in three states simultaneously while technically dead ("Of course whether or not this is even possible has to be considered a legal nicety").

• Look Out East is a mish-mash of regional UK news programmes (the name is a parody of Look East). They lead with banal stories ("Man has teeth stolen!") and feature smutty banter between the hosts, Phil Curdridge and Sarah Holt, and the weather presenter, Russ ("The closest was the time we visited a Portuguese nudist beach! That's the time my daughter was conceived, I think..."). All these end with "Let's not even go there!" or "Please, boys!".

• PVS News, the earnest, no-frills network. The set, presentation, and on screen graphics mirror that of BBC News 24. The main anchors are Adam Lockwood and Frances Walsh (reportedly born within minutes of each other and have been indistinguishable ever since) whose running gag is to complete each other's words and sentences. The station features live links to various locations, with international correspondent Will Parker. The station uses poor quality live satellite links to locations where events have not occurred yet ("Donald Rumsfeld is very much his own man, and people here are talking about what he will not say as much as what he will say when he does turn up. He will probably not say what we expect him to say, because that's not his style") and covers unimportant stories too, just to fill up the time ("Due to a debate between TV producers and librarians, news channels cannot shoot new footage of libraries. These library pictures were shot months ago.") The field reporters often ask the main anchors "What more can you tell us" - a complete role reversal.

• SO News claims to supply everything you ever wanted to know about the world of celebrity, similar in style to BBC3's now defunct Liquid News. Presented by Claudia van Sant and Colin Kay, the channel leads with vapid gossip on various celebrities, with an incredibly camp American reporter live in Los Angeles, Josh Cashman, who begins all reports with 'Pur-leasee!' ("I mean, can you imagine if Robin Williams turned up naked to his next premiere?").

Other smaller networks include: Bloomberg Television is a cable television network that broadcasts business and financial news 24 hours a day. ... Marks and Spencer plc (known also as M&S and sometimes colloquially as Marks and Sparks) is the largest retailer in the United Kingdom by sales. ... The ITV News Channel was a 24 hour television news channel in the United Kingdom which broadcast from 2000 to 2005. ... International Space Station insignia ISS Statistics Crew: 2 As of March 5, 2006 Perigee: 352. ... Binomial name Solanum lycopersicum L. The tomato (Solanum lycopersicum) is a plant in the Solanaceae or nightshade family, native to Central and South America, from Mexico to Peru. ... The term National Socialism has been used in self-description by a number of different political groups and ideologies, some of which have no connection with the Nazis; see National socialism (disambiguation). ... Jonathan Ross OBE (born November 17, 1960, Leytonstone, London, England) is a British television and radio presenter and film critic. ... Film 2006 is a weekly film review show on the BBC. The first series was broadcast in 1972 under the title Film 72, and the title has been updated annually to match the year of broadcast. ... Sky Sports News (SSN) is a 24-hour sports news channel in the United Kingdom. ... Manchester Uniteds emblem Manchester United F.C. (often abbreviated to Man United or just Man U, pronounced man-yoo) is an English football club based at Old Trafford in Greater Manchester. ... To meet Wikipedias quality standards, this article or section may require cleanup. ... ITV newscaster Mark Austin. ... Official language(s) English Capital Largest city Raleigh Charlotte Area  Ranked 28th  - Total 53,865 sq. ... For other people with the same name, see Michael Jackson (disambiguation) Michael Joseph Jackson (born August 29, 1958), sometimes referred to as The King of Pop or Wacko Jacko, is an American musician and entertainer whose successful music career and controversial personal life have been at the forefront of pop... Orenthal James Simpson (born July 9, 1947 in San Francisco, California), publicly known by the initials O.J., and nicknamed The Juice, was a Hall of Fame college and professional football player and film actor. ... Susie Fowler-Watt, Stewart White & Jules McKeith The BBC Look East ident BBC Look East is the BBCs regional television news programme for the eastern region, which comprises: Bedfordshire, Buckinghamshire, Cambridgeshire, Essex, Hertfordshire, Norfolk, Northamptonshire and Suffolk (NB - the term East here differs from the political East of England... BBC News 24 is BBC News 24-hour news television channel in the UK, its international counterpart being BBC World. ... Donald Henry Rumsfeld (born July 9, 1932) is currently serving as the 21st United States Secretary of Defense, since January 20, 2001, under President George W. Bush. ... A Television producer oversees the making of television programmes. ... The Librarian, a 1556 painting by Giuseppe Arcimboldo A librarian is a person who develops procedures for organizing information and provides services which assist and instruct people in the most efficient and effective ways to identify, locate, access, and use information and resources (articles, books, magazines, etc. ... -1... In Psychodrama, Role Reversal is a procedure or method in which the Protagonist is asked, normally by the Psychodrama Director, to exchange places with another character on stage (an Auxiliary Ego) so that the former moves into the role of the latter and vice versa. ... BBC Three, the replacement for BBC Choice, is a British television channel from the BBC broadcasting only on digital cable, terrestrial and satellite. ... The Liquid News ident Christopher Price presenting a Liquid News programme Liquid News was the daily round up of entertainment news for BBC Three (formerly BBC Choice) running from May 30, 2000 to April 1, 2004. ... The term camp—normally used as an adjective or a noun, even though earliest recorded uses employed it mainly as a verb— originally referred to the deliberate and sophisticated use of kitsch, mawkish or corny themes and styles in art, clothing or conversation. ... This article is about the largest city in California. ... Robin Williams performing in Iraq. ...

• 15 Second News, based on BBC3's 60 Seconds news bulletins. In order to make the news "manageable", important stories are broken into three word headlines ("In national news a car is found in a tree in Basingstoke. Israel threatens. In sport, two world records are broken. More later").
• Traffic Round-up-date, a round-up of the latest traffic conditions (similar to BBC London's reports in the morning). Roads are routinely mis-labeled (or in some cases, made up entirely) ("On the A313131, Fiddler's Elbow, a lorry has overturned, spilling its load of cars. Traffic is slow to the extra volume of cars on the road", "Motorists have been warned of some weather in severe parts of the country").
• World Money Today: A spoof of BBC News 24's World Business Report, with similar graphics and simulcast between several presenters worldwide. The main presenter is Dan Evans, based in a London studio. The other reporters are based in New York, Hong Kong, Tokyo, Berlin, Geneva, Buenos Aires, Johannesburg and Sydney.

Occasional separate weather reports are thrown in, with graphic and presentation styles similar to those found on many television channels in the UK. They are often cut together in such a way that the resulting sentences are complete nonsense. The weather reports vary from almost useless ("There's going to be a lot of air tomorrow") to over-useful ("The northern Tajikistan province of Gorno-Badakhstan has experienced no weather for over four months now.") and gives pointless figures similar to the pollen, pollution and sun indices used by BBC and ITV weather stations ("There is a warning of high altitude for people living on mountains in the Pennines and Yorkshire Dales"). The 60 Seconds ident, note the timer in the top right corner 60 Seconds is a short news programme run between shows and during films on BBC Three. ... BBC London News is the regional news programme for London. ... BBC News 24 is BBC News 24-hour news television channel in the UK, its international counterpart being BBC World. ... Gorno-Badakhshan Autonomous Region (GBAR) is a mountainous province (region) of Tajikistan. ... ... Typical Pennine scenery. ... A village in the Yorkshire Dales The Yorkshire Dales lie in an area of high ground in North and West Yorkshire, England. ...

Episodes

1. Tomato Flu An outbreak of tomato flu is in the headlines. This alarming new super-virus (a parody of avian flu) can be traced back to a turkey farm in Turkey. The news networks advise on the best way to avoid tomatoids in food such as tomato ketchup. In other news: a man is injured by a frozen block of urine.
2. Missing Island A report that an island has gone missing in the Barents Sea triggers paranoia about rising sea levels in Lincolnshire and the end of the world as we know it. In other news: teenagers' attention spans are now as low as eleven seconds.
3. Half Way There Day Reports on commemorations around the country to mark the day Britain reached the half-way point in the last World War. In other news: The MADI music awards are here again, without last year's controversy.
4. Crime The publication of a Home Office report which reveals that the majority of teenagers are now criminals leads to a series of news stories from the country's worst-hit areas. A picture of Britain in which the teenage population "now effectively feral, roam Britain's urban landscapes in packs of up to fifteen at a single time." In other news: East Anglia could be gone within a decade.
5. Bolivian Crisis Reaction comes from around the world to rumours that Bolivia might have acquired nuclear weapons. Including a report from The White House: This is a bad day for the good guys, President Bush. In other news: A cross-eyed man kills a horse while trying to shoot himself.
6. Hijack Media frenzy is quick to follow after reports emerge of an apparent hijack of an American passenger flight bound for Amsterdam. This live breaking story dominates the running orders of the world's news networks. In other news: An injunction has been served on Josh Cashman.

Avian flu is any flu caused by a virus adapted to birds. ... This article is about the condiment; for the singers, see Las Ketchup. ... Location of the Barents Sea. ... Lincolnshire (abbreviated Lincs) is a county in the East Midlands of England. ... A World War is a military conflict affecting the majority of the worlds major nations. ... The modern concept of Small Office and Home Office or SoHo , or Small or Home Office deals with the category of business which can be from 1 to 10 workers. ... Norfolk and Suffolk, the core area of East Anglia. ... The mushroom cloud of the atomic bombing of Nagasaki, Japan, 1945, rose some 18 km (11 mi) above the epicenter. ... This page is about the official residence of the President of the USA. For other White Houses see White House (disambiguation). ... President Bush may refer to two different people who were Presidents of the United States: George H. W. Bush, the 41st President of the United States, 1989 - 1993. ... Amsterdam Location Flag Country Netherlands Province North Holland Population 742,951(1 January 2005) Coordinates Website www. ... An injunction is an equitable remedy in the form of a court order that either prohibits or compels (restrains or enjoins) a party from continuing a particular activity. ...

Similarities to The Day Today

Some have accused the show of being too close in style, presentation, writing and humour to the groundbreaking news satire The Day Today, first broadcast in 1994. However, co-creator John Morton said in The Guardian "I hope after the first 10 minutes of our show you realise that it's a different animal from The Day Today. The target has changed because we've got this Tower of Babel of news. Plus we're sillier and more harmless." The Day Today was a surreal British parody of television current affairs programmes. ...

Although its detractors don't claim the whole of Broken News is directly taken from The Day Today, they do note some similarities between both shows, which include:

• Whimsical, surreal headlines to start the show
• News story about "a slab of frozen urine" falling from the sky, when The Day Today had a story about a "'spear of frozen urine" falling from the sky. The story about a missing island parallels a short on the Day Today about terrorists stealing an island.
• Sketches where person chatting to newscaster is asked to sum up situation "in a word", by which the newscaster means one single word
• Traffic reporter standing next to TV showing CCTV pictures of various roads and motorways giving a weird report.
• Slightly changing the name of a real American station by one letter (CNN to CBN in The Day Today, CBS to IBS in Broken News)
• Parody of a business report with a lot of incomprehensible financial gibberish appearing at the bottom of the screen.
• The presenter's speech having some of the most unimportant words emphasised by the graphics writing them out as they say them.
• Off-topic chat between presenters leading in strange directions.
• An American correspondent who follows useless and vapid celebrity news.

External links

Wikiquote has a collection of quotations related to:

Broken News

• Broken News at The Internet Movie Database
• Broken News website
• Broken News Forum
• John Morton interviewed in The Guardian